Say that word out loud —
I don’t like the way that it sounds,
especially today when precious
plans had to be scrapped.
The root of this word means
to “cross out,” “deface,”
“nullify,” from the Latin
cancellare, “to make
like a lattice,” and I feel
that crisscross shadow
in lines upon my face, a dark
cloud breaking up my sunshiny
demeanor. We forget how important
an event becomes as we prepare
and await, swept up in the envisioning —
pleasant in the planning even as we wish
the time would hurry up and arrive.
But like an ugly bit of vandalism
splashed across the date on a calendar,
we sometimes must contend with that word,
mark through days we looked forward
to experiencing. A joy deleted.
— Heavy sigh — So we mourn,
dust off the disappointment, restore
our hurting heart by anticipating
the next time, praying it will be soon.
C.L. Fisher, June 2020
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